9 weeks and counting! :)

I am officially exhausted, arggggh! and feeling sick, argggh! but also so hungry all the time! I am 9+3 today and time is going really slowly. However a little progress has been made and I have finally got my referral to Kingston hospital through (where I have chosen to have the baby) and I have been given lots of details about my first midwife appointment (1st March) and also my first proper scan at 12 weeks (when I can finally announce our news to the world, after knowing for ageeeeeeees!) where we get to see our little one a bit closer and hopefully a bit more baby like! At the moment, I believe I have a little jelly bean sized baby inside me! We have nicknamed them 'beanie' for now :) I am counting down the days until 12th March for my scan, by then I will be about 12+2!

Our little beanie is no longer an embryo but now officially a foetus. Mumsnet website says, "
Now your baby is looking less like a jellybean and more like a jelly baby with an oversized head. She is 3cm from the top of her head to her bottom and will double her length in the next three weeks." How exciting :)

So generally I have been feeling pretty damn awful but at least I am starting to get a little bump, not that many people would probably notice. My leggings and underwear are getting too tight though, lovely stuff!

I look kinda huge huh?! Thank god for baggy jumpers!

xoxo

Heartbeat

So it has been a crazy few days in bump land but all is well. On Wednesday I started bleeding a little and of course, we thought the worst especially as it's still such early days. Being the type of person I am, I of course completely panicked. However Michael remained calm for me and I booked a doctors appointment immediately first thing the next morning. I suspected to be fobbed off and not taken seriously but thankfully I was and my GP could probably see how worried I was and referred me to the Early Pregnancy Unit at Kingston (the hospital I have chosen for baby to be born in!). I had 30 mins to rush up there for my appointment, thankfully Michael was able to come too-in true Superman style, he rushed out after me and met me there, worn out from running and rushing. I love that man so much.

Anyway after filling in tons of forms, I saw a lovely doctor who explained they would do a scan to see if everything was okay. I didn't realise you could do a scan so early (was 6 1/2 weeks at the time) but after a little pause, the doctor said she could see the 'baby' (I'm guessing at this stage I can't really call it that) and me and Michael saw what looked like a tiny jelly bean on the screen which is our baby! She said everything looked good which was such a relief. She told us to look closely for the heartbeat and then we saw it! It was a very special moment, almost like a confirmation to me that said, "Yes, you are pregnant, it's happening!". She dated me at the stage I thought I was (as opposed to the doctor who put me a week ahead) and believes I am due around the 24th September. That is 1 day before my birthday-crazy! How strange and wonderful it would be to share the same birthday with our child. I am so happy Michael was there with me to share that unique and special moment-I know we are not out of the woods yet but I feel like seeing the heartbeat has made me even more confident that everything will okay xxx

p.s: I will be about 7 weeks on Monday and should have my first 'proper' scan in just over a month. EXCITED!

6 weeks along!

So I am now officially 6 weeks and feel rather rotten to be honest! The nausea has hit and had to take a sick day off work today because as well as pregnancy symptoms I have this horrible trapped nerve which is causing me a lot of pain. I find it hard to muster up any enthusiasm for food unless it's greasy and bad. Michael wants me to start eating a little healthier so I am going to try and make a concious effort. It's hard when all you are craving is bad stuff! I don't fancy things like puddings anymore although I still sneak the odd cake in (I'm pregnant after all, not crazy! :p). My main symptom and the one which is causing me the most hassle is my extreme tiredness. I find I am having to have naps all the time and I am just slugging about from place to place. 

Michael and my mum are doing a great job of looking after me but all I seem to want to do is sleep. Me and Michael get excited talking about all the wonderful things we can do when the baby is here and planning the new layout of our bedroom. We have already decided on our names for a boy or a girl but we don't really want to share them with anyone.

So now I am 6 weeks pregnant, the baby is looking even more...well baby like and looks a little like this. Apparently they are now the size of a pea with the heart being the size of a poppy seed. It is crazy when you think how small it is.

Most websites say at this stage, "Your baby is also developing tiny buds that will become arms and legs further along the line. Its heart is rapidly developing from a simple tube to the complex four chambers which pump blood around its body."

How exciting :) I am hoping this horrible sick/tired phase passes and it's so hard not being able to tell anyone and with work not knowing yet. I just hope time passes quickly xoxo

5 weeks and feeling it!

I am starting to feel so tired! I only work about 4 1/2 hours a day now but I finish work at lunchtime feeling completely exhausted. Could this be one of my first pregnancy symptoms? I am officially over 5 weeks now and the time is dragging. I just desperately want to see our baby in that grainy screen and know that everything is okay. I know that time isn't far away but I wasn't built for waiting for ANYTHING!

In the mean time, I have been reading lots of books and two I highly recommend are:

The Rough Guide to Pregnancy and Birth

Expecting: Everything You Need to Know about Pregnancy, Labour and Birth

  I figure I may get through about 10 of the 100's of pregnancy books out there right now! I love to know what is going on week by week and currently in week 5, the baby looks well...sorta of like a seahorse?

This week the 'baby' (unsure whether to call it this yet) starts to have a heartbeart and the organs start forming. I believe that it's also the size of an apple pip...so REALLLLLY small! The beginnings of the brain are forming as well as the nervous and reproductive systems. 

I can't wait until I have a bump-I already have a little one but I believe that is the cupcakes taking their toll on me. I imagine I will be one of those annoying women who take a picture of their bump every month! It's a good job we had no summer holiday booked (we plan to save as much money as possible!) as I probably wouldn't be able to fly. However our holiday in Berlin next month will be a little last burst of freedom!

I just can't wait to hold our baby in my arms.

xoxo

4 weeks along x

Well I believe I am now over 4 weeks along in my pregnancy :) I still can't quite believe I am saying that word and that there is a baby (well right now, a group of cells!) growing inside me. I even took another test because I couldn't believe it.

I went to the doctors yesterday to say, "I am pregnant, what do I do now?". His response was "give birth". Funny but not particularly useful. He took all my family history and details, he gave me an estimated due date which is different to what I thought...17th September 2013. So we shall see, I personally think I am due later!  He referred me to Kingston Hospital which is where I have chosen to have our baby. We have about an 8 week wait until my first scan/appointment and it just want it to go VERY VERY QUICKLY.

I certainly am starting to feel different and I am slowly realising that in just over 8 months time, we will have another member of our family. I picture every day what that scene will look like and it makes me beam from ear to ear. I have slowly started to feel some symptoms-I have been going off food a bit which is NOT like me. I have also had very achey ermmm (for the sake of embarrassment I shall just say the correct word...breasts) and also going to the toilet ALL the time (which again, isn't like me). I have had aches and weird feelings in my stomach, particularly today and wonder whether there is something rather exciting going on in there...I wish I could take a little look inside although to be honest I bet it looks rather disgusting. Right now, according to various websites and my ipad app, it looks a bit like this in my stomach at the moment:

I am aware I am still writing this blog to myself but I have to write down how excited I feel-I really can't wait to tell everybody. I bought a super cute pregnancy journal online so I can fill in week by week how I am feeling and stick in photos and then when our baby is older, I can show them.

Michael and I have *already* started debating baby names and we're set on our girls name and have about 3 choices for the boys names. I have to wait rather a long time until we find out what we're having but I may cave in and pay a bit extra for an early gender scan at 16 weeks. Do you really think I can wait until 20 weeks to find out? NO WAY!

xoxo

The start of something special...

Something amazing has happened. Something life-changing and I can't believe I am writing it. Last week, we found out I am pregnant. ME, PREGNANT! When we found out, I literally cried tears of joy. My mind filled with wonderful images of us all as a family, something we have wanted for so long. This certainly was planned and me and Michael (and mum) couldn't hide how happy we felt. 

As soon as the shock wore off, I felt an overwhealming feeling of happiness as well as fear. I know how early days this is and I know things can go wrong-I am not naive. That doesn't mean that right at this moment, I am not completely elated. I have done a million tests as well as a digital one to confirm and yes...they all say the same thing, it's true, I am pregnant and due at the end of September! Just before my 27th birthday-how perfect!

Now of course my first initial feeling was to shout it from the rooftops but I know that is not a good idea. I have of course told my mum and a few other people but that is it. I am too scared to tell anyone else in case the dream comes to an end. I must remain positive though as why not, I feel I am allowed to be excited...I am growing a little baby in my tummy after all!

To become a mother and father is something me and Michael have wanted for some time. For me personally I have always had that maternal extinct and I started working with children in the first place because I just adore them and I love watching them grow and change every single day. I love all the little things like when they get super excited because they have found a worm in the mud. Or when they giggle and laugh at the smallest, silliest things. I have always wanted to experience those special moments with my own child and I guess...it looks like I will be!

I just want these 3 months to hurry up so that the most dangerous period is over and I can tell people (I am so impatient) and I can just enjoy being pregnant and look forward to our little one's arrival. Tomorrow I will be 4 weeks pregnant in 'pregnancy terms' so yes it is very early days and I certainly don't feel pregnant. Currently my symptoms are:

Tired

Bloating

Going off food

That is about it! At this moment in time I am writing this blog to myself as of course, I don't want anyone to know right now. However when the time is right I shall make this blog public and I can share with you all my journey...it is going to be an amazing one, I can feel it. xxx